Complacency, Caution, and Confidence: An ongoing attitude adjustment

I was looking over my race recaps (putting together my brand new races page) and I realized that they all follow the same basic pattern. By the end of the post I’m satisfied (Hyannis), happy (St. Pat’s), or even elated (NYC!), but at the start they are full of doubt: “I wasn’t sure what to expect,” “I wasn’t exactly sure what my ‘strategy’ was going to be…I was at a total loss,” “I was in a weird place.” Wow. I know I joke about being a little bit clueless, but this is a bit much.

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The Magic of NYC

I was in a weird place going into Sunday’s NYC Half Marathon. I was thrilled with my Hyannis time, but still annoyed with my shoes, and those stupid four seconds. I was annoyed with myself for letting a few seconds, in horrible conditions, prevent me from enjoying what was actually a huge accomplishment. I was concerned about my hamstring, and unsure how to balance easing off and resting, with feeling ready and well prepared for NYC. I was too hungry or too full. I was tired, both physically and mentally. I didn’t feel like finishing my swim workout on Friday, so I didn’t. And I didn’t even care.

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The long run that maybe shouldn’t have happened, but did anyway

And I think I’m ok with it.

In the week following Hyannis, I wasn’t quite sure what to do. A part of me thought that a significant PR meant I deserved some rest. Another slightly bratty part of me was pissed that I missed breaking 1:45 by four seconds and was aching to pound out every run – hard – between now and the NYC Half on the 17th in hopes of being ready to crush my new PR. The rational part of me tried to point out that the NYC Half will happen no matter what, and it might be in my best interest to find balance so that I can recover from what was in fact a hard race and be fresh and uninjured for the NYC Half, giving me the best chance to kill those 4 seconds.

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